10.04.2026 | The Great Barrier to Connection - Pastor Luke Faw
The Great Barrier to Connection – Pastor Luke Faw
Indebted to insights from John Mark Comer and Dr. Kurt Thompson
1. SHAME KEEPS US HIDDEN AND ALONE!
Genesis 2:25 (NLT) – Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame.
Genesis 3:5-11 (NLT) – “God knows that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it, and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil.”
6 The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. 7 At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves.
8 When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. 9 Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?”
10 He replied, “I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked.”
11 “Who told you that you were naked?” the Lord God asked. “Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?”
Three types of sin:
1. A sin I do
2. Sin done tp me
3. And sin done around me
How do we get free from shame?
2. SHARE YOUR SHAME.
“The reason that AA is often more transformative than even Eucharist at church is because it's actually closer to the biblical practice of confession.” - unknown
James 5:16a (NLT) – Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.
We confess our sins to God to be forgiven, but we confess our sins to one another to experience healing!
Confession is the way that I partner with the spirit to uproot this sin in my life. - Dr. Kurt Thompson
Hebrews 10:25 (NLT) – And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.
3. BREAK THROUGH THE BARRIER OF SHAME.
2 Corinthians 4:2 (NIV) – Rather, we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to every man’s conscience in the sight of God.
YOU WILL NEVER HEAL BY HIDING!
- Find safe people
So, are we trustworthy people?
Galatians 6:1-3 (NLT) – Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.
- Be safe people (adapted from Dr. Cloud)
· Presence: showing up not just physically but also emotionally
Colossians 3:12b (NLT) – “… you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”
Grace: Unconditional acceptance without enabling harmful behavior
1 John 4:18a (NASB 1995) – There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, …
Truth: Honest, loving confrontation and guidance
Ephesians 4:15a (NLT) – Instead, we will speak the truth in love…
- Don’t stomp around the soul!
- Focus on calling over comfort!
Join us Wednesday to find out what to do if and when someone confesses to you!
Questions for discussion/reflection:
1. Have you ever tried to share something shameful? If yes, did it go well or poorly?
2. Do you have safe people in your life?
3. What are the best first steps you can take toward finding safe people?
4. Are you terrified by confession to a person? If yes, why?
5. Are you a safe person? If not, where do you need to grow to be a safe person for others?
6. Do you have people in your life regularly asking you questions like Wesley’s? Why or why not?
